Coach Z

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Revision as of 07:18, 10 September 2006

"You can't just rush into the score zone!"

Biography

Coach Z is the "coach" of Homestar Runner and the gang, though it is unclear just which sports he coaches. He has a strong Upper Midwestern accent which sometimes gets him into trouble. He almost never says anything negative to anyone, and he often offers more encouragement than is needed. When giving advice, he almost always starts with the phrase "You can't just rush into the score zone", which by now has pretty much lost its meaning. He wears a baseball cap and is famous for the large Z emblem around his waist, but nobody knows for sure whether his bright green color is his skin or a body suit (although the picture to the right might give a clue- apparently baby Coach Z is wearing footy pajamas).

The craptain of the foortball torm!

As Coach Z himself is not afraid to admit, he's got more than two problems. Despite being a coach, he doesn't know what a basketball is, as indicated in secret recipes. It has been implied that he has a crush on Marzipan, and he has on several occasions left inappropriate messages on her answering machine, including one occasion where he was drunk. (Further evidence of his drinking problem is his consumption of mouthwash in The Best Decemberween Ever.) Additionally, he had to apologize to her in the Fall Float Parade for "inapprapriate" comments. In addition to his frequent mispronunciations, Coach Z also seems to have mental problems, as evidenced by the time he spent "talking to his parents" on a disconnected telephone, and claiming to be a mother in garage sale. He has even stated on one occasion that he sometimes "forgets what's real, and what's just in his head". He also apparently has trouble managing his money, causing his electricity to be shut off each year. He works with Homestar Runner and Bubs as the apparent local law enforcement in Free Country, USA, and he makes frequent jokes and references about pants, whether his own or someone else's.

Coach Z is a fan of hip-hop and rap music, particularly the Wu-Tang Clan. He fancies himself a rapper as well: He released the single "These Peoples Try to Fade Me," which appeared on Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits, and his solo album, entitled "The Z Is All Up Ins", features the smash hit "Hip Hop Dance."

Coach Z and Bubs apparently had a falling out at one point, as Fall Float Parade tells us. But as of the e-mail narrator it seems they're back to having boring conversations outside Bubs' Concession Stand.

Coach Z apparently owns 4 Tony awards but it is unknown if he actually won them.

• Domicile: Coach Z's Locker Room
• Debut: "Where My Hat Is At?"
• Complete Filmography

Coach Z's emblem

Youthful days

Hatless

Character Video Transcript

{Page Title: Drop Down and Gimme 20!!} {Places: Coach Z's Locker Room}

COACH Z: {looking slightly offscreen} Is that thing on? {turns to the camera lens} Hey there, ho there! I'm the Coach! The Coach Z, I'd guess you'd call me. Or plain old Coach is fine, seein' as I'm the only one around, so, probably no one else would answer to that. You say "Hey Coach!", and I'd say "Yeah?" or..."That's me!" or..."Hoo-hah!" {waves his arms in the air} Any one of those. There's rumors flyin' around that I sleep in one of these lockers {gestures to the lockers behind him}, but uh, that's just not true. I usually crash on this bench here. {gestures to the bench behind him} My back's not in real good condition. {rubs his back} And now, I'd like to perform my hip-hop single, "These peoples try to fade me." {holds up a microphone, begins to sing} A one-two, a one-two—!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {appears in front of camera} Sorry. We're all out of tape.

Coach Z's Accent

The primary factor in his hilarity, Coach Z's Upper Midwestern accent has made him into a very quotable character.

Phonetic Sounds Affected

The most commonly mispronounced sounds are long /e/ (i.e. The Cheat) and the short /o/ (job), which both come out as an "or" or "aer" ("The Chort", "jaerb").

List of mispronounced words

Inconsistencies

Evidence has suggested that Coach Z's accent may be bogus:

• After saying "track or trort" in 3 Times Halloween Funjob, Bubs gets on his case and he says it correctly. If given "Swedish Fish," said as "Swordish Forsh," Bubs gets on his case again and Coach Z says "It's a crowd-pleaser."
• In boring (really), while Strong Bad is writing his list of three-letter words, Coach Z interrupts him at the word "job", saying that "jorb is a four letters word."
• Coach Z says "The Cheat" immediately after "The Chort" in mascot, though he speaks as though he's talking about two different people.
• In the DVD commentary for part-time job, Mike exploits Coach Z's "accent" by implying that not only does Coach Z add the letter R to words, but now also likes to switch letters around sometimes, and in reply Coach Z partially admits to his accent being bogus.
  • Furthermore, Marzipan implies in Fall Float Parade that Coach Z's way of speaking may just be a made-up language all in itself ("That's Pom Pom Balloon, for those of you who don't speak Coach Z").

Featured in

• A Jorb Well Done
• Coach Z Talker

Fun Facts

• Coach Z's accent came from a depressing Midwestern voice that Matt and some friends would do in college.
• It was revealed in issue #21 of Wonkavision magazine that Coach Z is named after Craig Zobel.

Variations

• The Fort Wayne Locomotive (Old-Timey)
• 20X6 Coach Z (20X6)
• Renaldo (Dangeresque)
• Coach Zed

Halloween Costumes

In each Homestar Runner Halloween special, Coach Z has dressed up as a rapper. (The Noid costume was not released.)

• Flavor Flav in Homestarloween Party.
• Humpty Hump in The House That Gave Sucky Treats.
• The Noid (not used in a 'toon, but seen on a secret page)
• Kid in Pumpkin Carve-nival.
• Kool Moe Dee in 3 Times Halloween Funjob.
• Tupac in Halloween Fairstival.
• Theo Huxtable (from The Cosby Show) in Halloween Potion-ma-jig.

Quotes of the Week

See Also

• Coach Z Evolution
• Other Costumes
• Nicknames

External Links

• watch Coach Z's character video
• view the Flash file for Coach Z's character video