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Inter-racial Relationships.
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Author:  Hi Guys [ Thu Dec 01, 2005 1:11 pm ]
Post subject:  Inter-racial Relationships.
(Please excuse me if this thread has already been made. I really didn't feel like looking.)

Ok, so recently, I found out that our church's youth group leader was against inter-racial relationships, to which I was all like, "...". And that lead me to thinking. What do you guys think about it?
Author:  DanBo [ Thu Dec 01, 2005 3:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
It don't matter to me. It might matter to my 83-year-old grandfather, but to the rest of my family, it wouldn't be that big of a deal. B
esides, isn't Canada like the real melting pot? I mean, sure it has its impurities (FCs!!) but it does deal with inter-racial relationships better than the US.
Author:  InterruptorJones [ Thu Dec 01, 2005 3:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
Hi Christmas wrote:
Ok, so recently, I found out that our church's youth group leader was against inter-racial relationships, to which I was all like, "...". And that lead me to thinking. What do you guys think about it?


I think your church's youth group leader should be fired, and perhaps put in the stocks. People like him (her?) are why a) Christians have such a bad rep, and b) racism is still alive and kicking in the U.S.
Author:  What's Her Face [ Thu Dec 01, 2005 3:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
Word, to what IJ says, if s/he's telling this to your group. It's no one's business but your own if you prefer to go out with people of your own race or any other.

Though I'll insert the usual "however".... it's worth being careful sometimes of cultural differences - they can cause problems in some relationships if you're not really prepared for them. I went out with a Zambian fella last year - he was a great guy, but his idea of a relationship was different from one I was used to. I had to end it because it was going too fast.

I knew a girl, as well, who went out with a Turkish guy. And the cultural differences were definately too much for that relationship to survive - especially when his family became involved.

Having said that, many inter-cultural relationships that I know of go very well. It's just worth bearing some things in mind.
Author:  ramrod [ Thu Dec 01, 2005 4:53 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
InterruptorJones wrote:
Hi Christmas wrote:
Ok, so recently, I found out that our church's youth group leader was against inter-racial relationships, to which I was all like, "...". And that lead me to thinking. What do you guys think about it?


I think your church's youth group leader should be fired, and perhaps put in the stocks. People like him (her?) are why a) Christians have such a bad rep, and b) racism is still alive and kicking in the U.S.
IJ, I couldn't agree with you more. I mean, who am I to say who can date who. If they're truely in love, nothing should stop them, not race, not religion, not family, nothing. With the exception of the extreme cases (such as a 27 year old guy and 14 year old girl).
Author:  racerx_is_alive [ Thu Dec 01, 2005 5:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
I just wanted to 2nd the inter-cultural relationships remark. They can and do work for many, but there are definately some unique challenges. Especially for inter-religious relationships. I know of many that have worked, but they can be very difficult at times, and it is important to go into them with both eyes wide open, willing to compromise and keep one eye shut after a commitment is made.
Author:  Smorky [ Thu Dec 01, 2005 6:15 pm ]
Post subject: 
Did your youth group leader give any reasons for being opposed to interracial relationships?
Author:  Jello B. [ Thu Dec 01, 2005 11:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
InterruptorJones wrote:
I think your church's youth group leader should be fired, and perhaps put in the stocks. People like him (her?) are why a) Christians have such a bad rep, and b) racism is still alive and kicking in the U.S.

ramrod wrote:
...who am I to say who can date who. If they're truely in love, nothing should stop them, not race, not religion, not family, nothing...

You two are definately two of the coolest people on this forum. Seriously. Your beliefs sum mine up very well about this whole issue.
Author:  Beyond the Grave [ Thu Dec 01, 2005 11:11 pm ]
Post subject: 
I have no problem with interracial dating, I think it is great. It shows us how far we have come.
Author:  Hi Guys [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 1:26 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
ramrod wrote:
InterruptorJones wrote:
Hi Christmas wrote:
Ok, so recently, I found out that our church's youth group leader was against inter-racial relationships, to which I was all like, "...". And that lead me to thinking. What do you guys think about it?


I think your church's youth group leader should be fired, and perhaps put in the stocks. People like him (her?) are why a) Christians have such a bad rep, and b) racism is still alive and kicking in the U.S.
IJ, I couldn't agree with you more. I mean, who am I to say who can date who. If they're truely in love, nothing should stop them, not race, not religion, not family, nothing. With the exception of the extreme cases (such as a 27 year old guy and 14 year old girl).


He never exactly said he was against it . He just said he didn't want his son doing it. Which still kind of makes him look like a crap hat.
Author:  Alberto [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 1:35 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
Hi Christmas wrote:
ramrod wrote:
InterruptorJones wrote:
Hi Christmas wrote:
Ok, so recently, I found out that our church's youth group leader was against inter-racial relationships, to which I was all like, "...". And that lead me to thinking. What do you guys think about it?


I think your church's youth group leader should be fired, and perhaps put in the stocks. People like him (her?) are why a) Christians have such a bad rep, and b) racism is still alive and kicking in the U.S.
IJ, I couldn't agree with you more. I mean, who am I to say who can date who. If they're truely in love, nothing should stop them, not race, not religion, not family, nothing. With the exception of the extreme cases (such as a 27 year old guy and 14 year old girl).


He never exactly said he was against it . He just said he didn't want his son doing it. Which still kind of makes him look like a crap hat.

So why, is he just plain racist or is it something that has to do with keeping up the family blood line or something like that (which is still kinda racist).
Author:  Mr.KISS [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 1:39 am ]
Post subject: 
If your youth group leader dude is like this, then why not do something? Tell them what you think and see what they say. If they have a logical reason then let it go, but if you really believe in it, stand up for it. They had no problem standing up for their beliefs, if they have a problem with you standing up for yours then...guh!
Author:  Simon Zeno [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 1:42 am ]
Post subject: 
KISS-Cringle 66 wrote:
If your youth group leader dude is like this, then why not do something? Tell them what you think and see what they say. If they have a logical reason then let it go, but if you really believe in it, stand up for it. They had no problem standing up for their beliefs, if they have a problem with you standing up for yours then...guh!


Logical reason? Surely you jest. If someone had a logical reason for something like that... then the universe would implode upon itself because of the impossibility of such an occurence.
Author:  Mr.KISS [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 1:47 am ]
Post subject: 
Simon Zeno wrote:
KISS-Cringle 66 wrote:
If your youth group leader dude is like this, then why not do something? Tell them what you think and see what they say. If they have a logical reason then let it go, but if you really believe in it, stand up for it. They had no problem standing up for their beliefs, if they have a problem with you standing up for yours then...guh!


Logical reason? Surely you jest. If someone had a logical reason for something like that... then the universe would implode upon itself because of the impossibility of such an occurence.


Well, you never know. If you don't find out thir reasons for their opinion you're just as dumb for not asking (what if they actually DO have a good reason?) I also seriouly doubt any reason they could produce could justify them being this way, but you still should find out.
Author:  Cobalt [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 3:57 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
ramrod wrote:
If they're truely in love, nothing should stop them, not race, not religion, not family, nothing. With the exception of the extreme cases (such as a 27 year old guy and 14 year old girl).


i completely disagree. love should not be the deciding factor. love can't save a relationship between people who have nothing in common, or who have vastly different values (religious or non-religious) or whose families decide to make the relationship really an issue. i think it's extremely selfish and stupid to put love on some pedestal, as if it's the most important thing in the world, and then everything else has to come second.

that said, i am not against inter-racial relationships at all. actually, people who come from mixed-race relationships are often the best looking and immunologically superior to people who aren't of interracial extraction. race-mixing is good for the species!
Author:  Mr.KISS [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 4:16 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
Cobalt wrote:
love should not be the deciding factor. love can't save a relationship between people who have nothing in common, or who have vastly different values (religious or non-religious) or whose families decide to make the relationship really an issue. i think it's extremely selfish and stupid to put love on some pedestal, as if it's the most important thing in the world, and then everything else has to come second.


Well if they don't have anything in common and/or they have a different religeon, why would they be in love? We're talking about loving marriages not getting married for the heck of it.
Author:  ramrod [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 4:19 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
Cobalt wrote:
i completely disagree. love should not be the deciding factor. love can't save a relationship between people who have nothing in common, or who have vastly different values (religious or non-religious) or whose families decide to make the relationship really an issue. i think it's extremely selfish and stupid to put love on some pedestal, as if it's the most important thing in the world, and then everything else has to come second.
Well, in my opinion, love should be the most important thing in a relationship. What would you rather have, an arrainged marriage? Maybe I'm crazy (in which I am) but I think that love should be the most thing in a relationship.


Hi Christmas wrote:
He never exactly said he was against it . He just said he didn't want his son doing it. Which still kind of makes him look like a crap hat.
Wait, what? Let me look back at your first post....

Hi Christmas wrote:
Ok, so recently, I found out that our church's youth group leader was against inter-racial relationships,


Now excuse me if I misinterpret this, but you said in your first post that he was against it. Even if it's just for his son, he's still against it.
Author:  Shippinator Mandy [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 4:44 am ]
Post subject: 
I'm perfectly fine with them. Honestly, I see no reason why they shouldn't be allowed.
Author:  Choc-o-Lardiac Arrest [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 4:54 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
Cobalt wrote:
i think it's extremely selfish and stupid to put love on some pedestal, as if it's the most important thing in the world, and then everything else has to come second.


listen, in terms of everything, this is how things are stacked up in most peoples lives
1.God
2.Family
3.Yourself


as for interracial dateing...... I love it, besides, the entire world is now
so mixed up in races, a white kid has a black grandpa, a mexican Cousin, and an Asian brother(someone been cheatin!). several members of the Ku Klux Klan actually have some kind of Black member of the family, Cousin, Grandpa, GGF,GGM, Etc.

i just say, Bring on the other races! ;)
Author:  Hi Guys [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 12:45 pm ]
Post subject: 
Perhaps I should explain how this situation started. My two youth group leaders (husband and wife) were taking their 3-year-old son to McDonald's. He got his happy meal and inside was a black doll. Being the imagination-filled child that he is, he was pretending to "save his girlfriend". At which point my youth group leader (let's call him "Jay"...because that's his name) told him that white people should only date white people and black people should only date black people. Do you see how messed up that is? A son that young has such a respect for his father that he's going to take that into his social life. (On a side note, his wife has the same opinion on this as I do.)
Author:  senorhomsar [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 2:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
I agree with the concensus on this opinion, that there is no earthly reason why inter-racial couples shouldn't exist. However, I would be interested to know if you think I'm racist by saying I would never marry a non-Jew, no matter how much I thought I 'loved' her, and feel in some way saddened (not angry) when Jews 'marry-out'?
Author:  Cobalt [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 6:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
KISS-Cringle 66 wrote:

Well if they don't have anything in common and/or they have a different religeon, why would they be in love?


i don't know, but it happens ALL THE TIME.
Author:  Cobalt [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 6:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
ramrod wrote:
Well, in my opinion, love should be the most important thing in a relationship. What would you rather have, an arrainged marriage? Maybe I'm crazy (in which I am) but I think that love should be the most thing in a relationship.
[/quote]

yeah, i would be in favour of arranged marriages (not against people's will, obviously) but it isn't practical in this society.

what is so important about love? nobody has ever been able to explain that to me. what makes it so friggin great and wonderful that everything else needs to step aside for it? love is NOT THAT IMPORTANT.
Author:  Cobalt [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 6:15 pm ]
Post subject: 
senorhomsar wrote:
I agree with the concensus on this opinion, that there is no earthly reason why inter-racial couples shouldn't exist. However, I would be interested to know if you think I'm racist by saying I would never marry a non-Jew, no matter how much I thought I 'loved' her, and feel in some way saddened (not angry) when Jews 'marry-out'?


i don't think it's racist, first beacuse Jews are not a race (since there are Jews of all races, it's more of a combo religion/ethnicity/nationality), and because it's something based in a shared history and common values. there's is a higher than 50% intermarriage rate among Jews now (outside of Israel, of course) and it becomes a matter of preserving the traditions.

(i'm also Jewish, and i also wouldn't marry a non-Jew, so i'm glad you feel the same way. but it's not the same thing as being against inter-racial marriage.)
Author:  Didymus [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 7:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
Us Christians likewise encourage our people to marry other Christians. It's mostly the shared values and beliefs that we feel are important.

I'm all for inter-racial marriages, as long as the couple are able to work through the cultural differences. The only concern I have is that sometimes the children might suffer some severe consequences as a result. I know of one lady from Trinidad who's in a mixed marriage, and her children are alienated from both the white and black children in their school. It's really sad, but unfortunately, the Delta still hasn't quite healed from the conflicts from last century. But that's really not the fault of the couple, but rather society's in not accepting as it should.
Author:  The Noid [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 9:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
Cobalt wrote:
ramrod wrote:
Well, in my opinion, love should be the most important thing in a relationship. What would you rather have, an arrainged marriage? Maybe I'm crazy (in which I am) but I think that love should be the most thing in a relationship.


yeah, i would be in favour of arranged marriages (not against people's will, obviously) but it isn't practical in this society.

what is so important about love? nobody has ever been able to explain that to me. what makes it so friggin great and wonderful that everything else needs to step aside for it? love is NOT THAT IMPORTANT.[/quote]

Love not being important? Thats why people should be married! People can trust each other with their love, and therefore would want to be binded forever. A relationship, marriage or not, is usually built on love, and you can't tell me the thing that holds marriage together isn't that important. Sure, back in old times, people had arranged against will marriages. Did they like it? The guys, yes, but the woman proabably hated it! And why? They don't know this person, they don't know anything about them. A marriage is binding two people WHO LOVE EACH OTHER legally. Without that, it's like...marrying someone you don't love, or...getting married on a bet.

That aside, I find that racist. I bet he isn't only all white, cause I don't think anybody is. Know the melting pot? I know you do, so I won't go into details. EVERYONE(almost I think) came from the melting, at least those who have immigrant relatives. Race should not change too many things. It's if a person loves each the other person, and they love each other back, it doesn't matter.
Author:  racerx_is_alive [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 9:46 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
The Groid wrote:
A relationship, marriage or not, is usually built on love, and you can't tell me the thing that holds marriage together isn't that important. Sure, back in old times, people had arranged against will marriages.


Lemee guess, The Groid. You ain't married.

A couple of things I have found from my experience: First, marriages aren't built on love. Love is a benefit and a blessing that you get from working on making the marriage work. If both the husband and the wife are committed to each other, and want the other person to be happy, then love will grow. The reason why the arranged marriages worked was because love would grow when the couples were decent people who generally wanted the best for each other.

And I just can't get over this part:

The Groid wrote:
Did they like it? The guys, yes, but the woman proabably hated it! And why? They don't know this person, they don't know anything about them.


Why should men be any more excited about arranged marriages than women? Your quote to me implies that women marry for love, while men only marry for laundry service, meals, and breasts. It's like you are saying that back in the day, the women would have liked to pick the man they loved, but the men all figured any girl would do.

I would be willing to bet that an arranged husband would be just as nervous and mournful as an arranged bride.

Now, bride kidnapping is a different story.

err, toastpaint.
Author:  The Noid [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 10:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Inter-racial Relationships.
racerx_is_alive wrote:
The Groid wrote:
A relationship, marriage or not, is usually built on love, and you can't tell me the thing that holds marriage together isn't that important. Sure, back in old times, people had arranged against will marriages.

Lemee guess, The Groid. You ain't married.


Considering I'm 10, no.

But sure, I kinda agree. I really just thought arranged marriages were just to "keep the royal bloodline" and stuff like that. And by that comment, the men were happy for getting a wife, and they have every to be, they had finally found a companion. In most stories and articles, the women have been less happy, but still happy.

I really can't see a marriage without it, though.
Author:  Mistle Rose [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 11:20 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hi Christmas wrote:
Perhaps I should explain how this situation started. My two youth group leaders (husband and wife) were taking their 3-year-old son to McDonald's. He got his happy meal and inside was a black doll. Being the imagination-filled child that he is, he was pretending to "save his girlfriend". At which point my youth group leader (let's call him "Jay"...because that's his name) told him that white people should only date white people and black people should only date black people. Do you see how messed up that is? A son that young has such a respect for his father that he's going to take that into his social life. (On a side note, his wife has the same opinion on this as I do.)


Report him. Have him fired.
Author:  Mr.KISS [ Fri Dec 02, 2005 11:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
Rosalie wrote:
Hi Christmas wrote:
Perhaps I should explain how this situation started. My two youth group leaders (husband and wife) were taking their 3-year-old son to McDonald's. He got his happy meal and inside was a black doll. Being the imagination-filled child that he is, he was pretending to "save his girlfriend". At which point my youth group leader (let's call him "Jay"...because that's his name) told him that white people should only date white people and black people should only date black people. Do you see how messed up that is? A son that young has such a respect for his father that he's going to take that into his social life. (On a side note, his wife has the same opinion on this as I do.)


Report him. Have him fired.


You can't have someone fired over their beliefs. That's like firing someone for not supporting gay marriage or something. That's just asking to be sued.
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